Warrior

 MasyaAllah, it has been awhile since I last posted something. I was enjoying the month of Ramadhan that I have forgotten to write anything about it, and now it's the month of Syawal! The month where we celebrate the end of Ramadhan and rejoice with accomplishments and joy. Last year my brother and his family came from Labuan to celebrate. This year my little sister is here and I am out of this world! I have always been this clingy sister to my brother and sisters, so yes, my clinginess can be so annoying, but who cares! I love them to bits! However, I might say, there would be a part of me being disappointed with people during this Eid. Why do we condemn people when we can pick each other up and progress? Why can't we be kind and empathetic? Why must we say hurtful things? In this month of Syawal, we try to ask for forgiveness and spread joy and love. Remind each other that there are many kinds of people and there might be a part of them that doesn't find our presence comf...

 I have published a post about the new year, but some good part of it made me sigh in self disappointment. Should I blame others? No, I shouldn't. But, it's all in the past now. I just hope it stays as the past where I would learn self-control and discipline. I need a new boost of confidence for 2026 to make a change in my life. My idle life. As always, a new year means a new set of resolutions. The only resolutions that I have for 2026 would be to live healthily and to be able to read 2 books per month. The former is scary, but I used to be fit, so there's no reason for me not to be fit again. Who knows... It could boost my confidence. Probably would make me feel good about myself -- for once after this past few years. Now... For my reading goal this year, I think I can achieve 2 books per month, so total would be 24 books for this year. I only managed to read 8 books last year, so I really need to have this resolution in order for me to (at least) achieve my target. Howev...

Andailah dapat jadi seperti mereka. Gah gemilang dalam segala apa dalam kehidupan. Aku di sini hanya menanti dan terus menanti. Belum tiba masanya lagi, tapi tetap ditembak dengan peluru kata yang menyakitkan. Bukannya aku tak mencuba, tapi aku cuba setiap hari. Aku bukan mereka; mereka sentiasa dapat apa yang mereka hajati. Aku? Aku tersekat dek batas segala. Aku tidak minta apa-apa pun. Aku hanya inginkan doa. Doa agar aku mampu menjalani hidup ini dengan baiknya sepertimana baiknya hidup untuk kalian. Benar. Aku juga mungkin dapat apa yang diingini, tapi itu berbeza. Aku bukan kalian. Namun... Kalian jugalah batu yang membantu untuk aku kembali stabil dalam hidup yang penuh onar ini. Kalian jugalah yang menadah tangan untuk aku pegang. Kalian jugalah tempat aku bersadu rasa. Kalian jugalah jantung hati hidup aku. Jadi, kenapa aku hendak merungut? Benar. Aku tidak sama seperti orang lain. Benar, aku hanyalah menusia yang darjatnya tidak tinggi menggunung. Benar, akulah orang yang tid...